Relational Abuse

This category contains 13 posts

A World Without Consent — Growing Up Goddy — Medium

Quote – “I had male and female friends who, though conflicted about their own sexual volition, wanted to have sex and were happy when it happened, even though they had not consented and in some cases protested.” I finally see the piece of the puzzle I’ve been missing all this time. When I was a … Continue reading

I found a letter I wrote to my abusive X before the divorce…. Have you ever wondered how abused people think?

The quoted letter was written to my X during the last three years of our “marriage”. In this post, I’m responding to myself in the past, correcting a few of those old perspectives. I wonder what I’ll think of it after a few more years of healing?This might be helpful to you or someone you … Continue reading

Are you vulnerable to manipulation? When relational predators turn strength into weakness.

Relational predators have an innate skill for turning strengths into weaknesses. Remember, just because who you are can be used against you doesn’t mean you are worthless. It just means you’re with someone who doesn’t know how to appreciate your value. And it’s important to understand, especially when dealing with predators, that every element of ones identity can appear as both a weakness … Continue reading

I left him because I loved him. For when your own safety isn’t convincing.

I can certainly identify with this woman’s story. I went through this mental process, too. – Mere Dreamer “My own well-being probably ought to be enough to get me out of danger and keep me out, but I’m not to that point in the process yet. And if you aren’t either, I’m writing this for … Continue reading

Mother’s Day: When failure to love changes the world.

Too often those of us who have been loved, albeit imperfectly, find it too easy to question the viewpoint of those who have been abused, thinking our small pangs of past misunderstandings qualify us to correct the perspective of the soul-wounded. We must be learn to fall silent, my friends, and allow others to express their truth in honesty. Beneath … Continue reading

What You Teach Your Kids When You Hit Them

“Do you want your child to grow up and fall in love with someone who hits them? How would you feel if your child’s partner hit them and then forced your child to hug them right afterward? When you hit your child and then say, ‘This is because I love you,’ what do you think … Continue reading

Things you can do for someone in an abusive relationship

The linked article is very important! I highly recommend that you bookmark it and share it. “Someone who is not an abuser can engage in abusive behaviors.[…]However, there is a difference between someone who does abusive things and an abuser.” “An abuser is what American culture tends to think of as a “sociopath,” although it … Continue reading

My abusive relationship was typical. When our culture denies the abused.

“How could I have let him do that to me! I didn’t understand anything I know now– that I’d been groomed basically my entire life for an abusive relationship by complementarianism and biblical patriarchy.” – Samantha Field Read the whole story: my abusive relationship was typical | Defeating the Dragons.

Do Ya’ll Want To Know The Truth?

“HUG A VICTIM INSTEAD OF A DAMN TREE.” Have you been a reluctant witness to emotional abuse or violence? In spite of an abundance of witnesses, justice isn’t always served, and your voice could make all the difference. Read one survivor’s story of a failed support system. via Do Ya’ll Want To Know The Truth?.

Two things about stories, and when to share them.

“…poor boundaries, making myself vulnerable to someone who is not safe. who is not capable of holding my story in their hands and seeing the gift, the importance, the weight of it. This was a person who didn’t want to know me; they wanted to change me.” “Grace is saving my story, my me-ness, for when they are ready … Continue reading

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